When do people make the plunge into trusting someone? Not just with small secrets or knowing that they’ll show up at a set time and place, but actually trusting someone.

Do you give people the benefit of the doubt and trust them shortly after knowing them? Or do they have to earn your trust over a long period of time? If they’ve got a bad track record and have hurt other people in the past, does that mean that you shouldn’t trust them- even if they’ve never crossed you?

How many people would you trust with your life? How many people would you trust with your innermost feelings and love? People may trust to easily, get hurt, and then never trust another person again.

How do I earn the trust of someone that I’ve never crossed before? How to I prove my worth, my faithfulness, my love to someone that I’ve never (meant to) hurt before.

So, things are messy right now. There’s a big fat reason why I don’t do long distance relationships. You can’t make things better with a hug or a smile or a surprise visit when you’re 5000kms away from someone. You can’t look at the person in the eye and tell them that things are going to get better. You can’t touch that person, and the whole time you’re away, you’re longing for the next moment when you can see that person again.

I leave here in about four months. I’m a third of the way through my trip. I’m having a blast- The Gambia is a beautiful country that is full of so many astounding things, sometimes my mind can’t comprehend it. But every night, I’m not counting my blessings about being here… my mind focuses on March 1st and the moment that I see him again. I’m having a hard time getting that out of my mind; I can’t stop counting down the days.

Every week’s the same, Monday I count down until Hump Day (Wednesday) when I know there are only two days left in the week. When Friday comes, it’s marked with Lariam and the beginnings of my weekend (as it’s a Muslim country and everything stops at 1pm on Fridays). My weekends go quickly and suddenly, I’m back on a Monday, and Friday seems so far away.

The only time that things feel right and I feel 100% good is when I’m by the ocean. Solution: more time spent at the ocean.

Oh, and seconds ago, The Boy told me that he’s going to come and be with me right after Christmas… this time, no “if”’s “and”’s or “but”’s.

HA!